Thursday, May 30, 2013

You gotta start somewhere.

Hello world,

I staked out this cyber space almost a month ago, and have only just today decided to break ground.  I think I put it off for so long because I felt like once I started, I would have to keep going.  I knew I wanted to make writing this blog a practice, and I wasn't sure I would be able to keep it up.  Well, here I am.

I'm an introvert.  This may come as a surprise to those who have witnessed me engaged in enthusiastic conversation (er, especially when I've had a little wine), but it's true.  I get energy from being alone.  In fact, I purposely wake up at least an hour before my partner and daughter do, just to have that peaceful time with my breakfast, coffee, and MPR.  It centers me; it makes me feel whole.

I have a lot to say, but mostly I say it to myself.  I've often thought that my mind is like a nonstop parade of thoughts, observations, insights... my challenge has always been to get it on paper, in a way that is coherent and engaging and really captures my brain.  Too often, writing feels like putting my hand under a running faucet, trying to hold on to as much as I can, but losing most of it in the process. This blog is an effort to practice, and get better.

In fact, there are a lot of things I'm trying to get better at.  I want to be a more loving partner, a more attentive parent, a more productive employee, a more interested friend.  I want to be stronger, healthier, more peaceful, more organized. There is a lot of ground to cover, a lot of things I'm already working on.

First things first.  This is me:

  • I'm 34 years old, and I live and work in Minneapolis, MN.  
  • I am a queer mother of an 8 year old girl, and married (no, not "legally," yet) to a tax attorney.  
  • I am an athiest, a feminist, and a pacifist.  
  • I like knitting and yoga.  
  • I like to talk about myself. :)

I am excited to start writing about the things that occupy my mind, and the ways I'm trying to grow.  Among other things, I imagine I'll talk about quitting smoking, running, parenting a complicated child, trying to be more present and connected in my relationships, and being a force for love.  I'll be surprised if anybody else is interested enough to read this.  Actually, I don't know what I would do if I had a real audience of any kind.  For now, I'll just pretend that this is my diary... which, of course, isn't far from the truth right now.